Tag Archives: book one

your ego has no halo


your ego has no halo

 

why when you get laid do i get screwed?

and you’re always dressed, while i blush nude

newsflash, your ego has no halo

her friends are all men

seems again and again

no key to their vault

it just wasn’t her fault

she was too needy

cared not for those greedy

aced crossword puzzles

with inked letter bubbles

angels accept cash

shorter lines do get fast

true colors seem dull

staring at stilled seagulls

she does not exist

or so she’ll still insist

scene selections read

while union jobs are dead

magic wand hard core

the one tool she adored

her hands are tied tight

she refuses to fight

a chuckle to laugh

cheeky smirks just in half

i’m headed somewhere

from here and everywhere

dragonflies in seas

firefly bumblebees

reader discretion

advised to perfection

she a puppeteer

strings were her biggest fear

manipulated

from means she created

she directs opal

three toys in total

they may not be real

but she knows that they feel

wood and fake faces

drunk and so wasted

string master unseen

talents seemingly obscene

the insanity

professional vanity

after a while past

time turned quick and fast

remaining unseen

she then could twirl her dream

puppets and not dolls

sculptures not stupid balls

it’s the innocent

that want us to invent

sick really sick

these wooden sticks

varnished and painted

cracked and sainted

trust me lay low

cause your ego got no halo

you fool your halo has the ego


His veins turned to Velvet


 

Feeling no pain

lost and lonely, scared and confused

It was clear he had nothing to lose

I was bleeding, enjoying the pain

Ecstasy spilling, right from my vein

But velvet became of his iron life

I was turning, right into his wife

As we became one

Became as one

His bite so sharp, with a slithered sound

I swear to God, I had been found

Feeling faint as I became his

Veins our fortress, like two little kids

Wild and turning, it had begun

No other mortal, would see me become

He was velvet, soon as he felt

My reception, at the state I dealt

Fearless wanting, more of his venom

Breathtaking gorgeous, I studied him

The more I did, the more I bled

My heart beating fast

Unknown if I would last

Yet a fame of fortune

Kept me from succumbing to run

And so I died

Blood trails my guide

He in velvet veins

Me turning insane

Immortal I was seeing

A gift of a new being

From fangs white as snow

Why me, I shall never know

That was then, but here is now

And someone best tell how I allow

A vamp of velvet

Got me so private

It was my turn, to bite back

It was my turn, to see black

To taste the velvet underground

To discover what he too once had found

I bit and sucked with all my might

Feeling his submission and lack of fight

It was final, I was not prey

Predator I did become today

Feeling no pain

 


Come lye here below me


lye here below me

When I was bitten, and chosen to be turned, I was already immortal. An angel. A fallen angel, yes, but an angel nonetheless

Tis that painting

To which you stare

I wrestle in hating

As she’s brushed there

 

Maybe see me so still

But it’s been a lie

A game to kill

What’s it like to cry?

 

I cannot comprehend

What it feels you say real

Wish I could once pretend

But it’s your emotions I do not feel

 

Unaware how you’ll be my prey

ever so soon, so fear what I say

 

 

Come to me now

Lay your body below me

Your going to feel how

Throbbing loved by we

 

Stare if you must

Your pissing me off

Loose the desired trust

I am furthest from soft

 

Unaware how you’ll be my prey

ever so soon, so fear what I say

 

Still you crave me

Based on what you have read

Fine weak mortal become we

I will enjoy rubbing on me as you bleed

 

Why must I attract

the obvious retards

Boring as expected to react

You pretend to feel some regard

 

You will die soon

This I say

Tomorrow by noon

I will enjoy you, my prey

 

Unaware how you’ll be my prey

ever so soon, so fear what I say

 

 

Soon to be master

You’ll think so smart

Watch me play faster

and rip out your heart

 

Best take credit

It’s already dieing

You begged and I read it

My fun an invite to rush your lieing

 

Let’s go, wait we have

Your challenge of jokes

Has clearly offered the road you pave

My joy the day you gasp from chokes

 

Unaware how you’ll be my prey

ever so soon, so fear what I say

 

Come play tough liar

This is my life

Decievinga crier

Feel my speed as your knife

 

You taunted first

Meaning I haunting last

Unaware I have yes started your curse

Fake mortals like you easily so fast

 

I promise you girly fool

I always get mine

Not one single rule

Especially of your kind

 

You know what’s so crazy

Is calling someone crazy

When you know they are

What is crazy baby?

 

Unaware how you’ll be my prey

ever so soon, so fear what I say

 

I laugh as you don’t know

Yet call me in public scared then go

Your about to see in person

Karma you disregard ah, so you worsen

 

Unaware how you’ll be my prey

ever so soon, so fear what I say

 

 

 

 


My Weapon your Lesson


 

I am Changing, Why? Time is……

Another Vampire Feast

Yet you enter me at least

I will never let go

Your desire I now know

To show you I am wide

My secret hides on my other side

Only alone do I feel this pleasure

Hidden are my gifts of pressure

Fears undeserving far to long an

Love, immortal, is our song

Time I pray will rid of his kills

Turning slowly I can’t sit still

Now I was able to let you see

My weapons are none more than me

The source that is killing

the very one I find thrilling

Tis far greater to mock my mistakes

In my life, immortal, no saviours gate

Time I suppose will help me with skills

More techniques to learn, rules and kills

Come I will never let go

Your desire I now know

To show you I am wide

My secret hides on my other side

Only alone do I feel this pleasure

Hidden are my gifts of treasure

Fears undeserving far too long

Love, not immortal, is our song

Time I pray will rid of his kills

Turning slowly I can’t sit still

Now I was able to let you see

My weapons are none more than me

The factor that is killing me

Is the very one I cannot feel just see

It is far greater to beg for my mistakes

And in my life, now immortal not fake

Time I suppose will help perfect my skills

Techniques teach obedience whilst one kills

Rather choose to obey and respect

Distribute fear to begin I will Infect

Chase as effect to hunt thy prey

Just to judge their fear this way

You do not know what I can do

The silence you hear, is calm for you

Mistake me again for being kind

Reveals stupidity in your witty mind

Make no mistake I live in peace

I can watch myself even as beast

Time I pray will rid of his kills

Turning slowly I can’t sit still

Should you hurt just one I love

Or mock my being just look above

Search for protection as you look up there

Do know the prey you hurt with no care

See and hear the clarity I speak

As you only do know we will meet

What? Is it possible to respect your smut?

Do hope your joking, your finished and cut

You the type who laugh even now

encourage in sequel, will show how

Time I suppose will help perfect my skills

Techniques teach obedience whilst thy kills

You so perfect in all of each day

Run, start now, my love, my next preY

Until eve of Tomorrows Day

I must know why I change, what’s biting my way

Regardless mY weapon, will be your lesson.

Trust you may, come lets preY

 


Weaker than Yesterday, Stronger than Tomorrow


She cried

somewhere deep in her chest

like the lions roar

but somehow stronger

not even remembering

the details that brought her here

and as she trembled

she felt that when

yet nothing else

could make the difference

for an empty soul

like her broken heart

and confused mind

physical destruction

her self harm

her life had brought her here

for no particular reason

with no particular purpose

the pain is what drove her

now it’s what owned her

and nothing can change that

not even a reconciliation

she feels no self-pity

no guilt

knows she is innocent

but fools herself

into believing

that all be true

she knows no truth

and has no fight

unable to strike

without consequences

far greater than her pain

she has no one to turn to

know one to talk to

in theory at least

because how could you talk

of such horrible things

that almost brought her to death

she’s weaker than yesterday

stronger than tomorrow

sits numb in today

as does she

she is anonymous

must be protected this way

will die to practice this

and live to ensure it

why her

before even she could move

her destiny was determined

her mother completely unaware

if only we could see

what lies before us

before it does

just maybe

just maybe

we could stop pain

since when does the mean

rule the world

such a stupid question

from a naïve girl

wonder what a magician

would cost to remedy

the life of the child

out of surgery

into recovery

from a broken heart

and she to be opened

and rectified

but not before the child

seems they will start again

with strength in there will

she cannot

now will left to be shown

a capture snapshot

of just one moment

when together they were

as one

knowing nothing of the future

that would bring them such pain

undeniably

ruining their lives

forever

and never

Dedicated

to a young sweet teenager. And it has been told she is seemingly exactly like her mother.


Magic is Free


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Magic is free

I am sure I can taste what a prose could be

Seems anything a dreamer dreams it to be

Such beauty I read in pain

Such inspiration I discover in vain

Magic is free

Do you believe?

You must commit

Or live without imagination

Lock up your child side

And live knowing everything

Has a price tag to it

What is my point?

I point at you

If just once I could wave my wand

To give all of you hope

To share my need inside that breeds

Which must be maintained

Through forgiveness

And yellow marshmallows

Simple see you already know

If all we ever did do

We could change our abyss

With sincerely of being nice to one another

I will not respond to logic

But will respond to magical efforts

Regardless of size

Size I disregard

Critical to remember we do not own time

I know I am not of special status

Yet status and undefined character is special

Pussy willows help also to expose my child

I process things in my mind

Like film before it is developed

I care so little of my labels

But wish to mend yours

I am unaware of your pain at this moment

Then I shall assume nothing but complexity

Our magic awaits a master, a leader

But can only breath with passion and desire

Patti cake Patti cake bakers man

Will you help the most you can?

Patti cake Patti cake bakers man

Open magic and touch who you can

Patti cake Patti cake, your magic awakes

Do you have to define differences between magic and miracle?

Can you let the cards fall where the must?

Do you recognize magic and even seeing it

Do you embrace it?

Is it a trick or illusion

Could there be forms of reality

We may be to fearful to embrace?

I ask you only from my own child

Do we create magic or can it be self reliant

Is magic defined by the importance of it’s stratey?

Maybe it’s shock value

A child starves to death

magic or miracle?

A child lives

Miracle or magic?

Must I define and categorize everything two 2 only explanations?

Imaging a world now, where I choose to reside

Aware of power and magic

Operating as second nature

If you live through all the pain

You will be gifted with this inspiration

You mock me but read

Why the secret when we all got made the same?

There are buckets of melting snow in the garage

Are you a remedy?

Collapse the facade and release your magic

I have and am no longer bitter, just better

I hate repetitive explanations just as here

If you will not be open to a dimension of magic

You shall never grow, reveal nor change

Your words of methods show

scepticism doesn’t last long they say

It will come out of you if you give it time

Your still asleep and that’s okay

your just accumulating more magic

The strongest magic of all

To ammend past judgements

and forgive ones received

magic


Upcoming Novel peak – A woman’s passion exposed


I crave a different form of passion tonight. Not a physical one.

Rather one that stems from imagination and grows with creativity. Parts of truth and parts of private wishes.

A true sketch of the dreams a woman desires from a man. Wishes from a man. From an unknown man.

I want to get this passion from words and build a moment in time. Writing only, to see where I can go.

Lets explore intimate parts of fantasy while creating passion.

Hmm… lets see, where does my dream start?

It starts with me brushing my long dark hair. Sitting at my makeup table staring at myself in the mirror, wondering how I am really perceived by my bad or good looks. I can never figure it out. However it seems to be continually on my mind.

All the shades are pulled down and I sit in my favorite lingerie. No plans, just alone and pampering myself after a long hot bath.

Regardless I proceed and apply makeup by wearing my eyes as black as I can, to start.

Lips blood red and Channel perfume. As I sit continuing to slowly brush my hair, still staring in the mirror, there is a knock at the door.

Startled, I check the time at 1 am and fear kicks in. I have no one that visits at this time. Especially unannounced.

Another knock, even louder and a male voice, calling my name.

I ran to my door’s peep hole and froze in shock as to who I was looking at.


Desperate denial


I need to know you’re out there still

To know you’re searching for me

How insecure I have become

Since our days of being free

Every night when I retire alone

I close my eyes knowing

I will have to wipe my tears away

These tears keep on growing

It is a lie time heals all wounds

My time I had with you

Never can I let my heart heal

I’m scared that’s all I can do

If I stood outside

And stared above

Would you show me

Or maybe bring me my love

I am ignorant to think so

As someone would bring him home

He never meant to create a crowd

And suffers now all alone

He shot his brother

By mistake at home

Now running for life

Trying to become unknown

He must be fearful

As all he’s known

Is structure and kindness

To the bone

His loss of many

That they will kill him for

Innocent now absent

Guilty at war

Only time can help me

As I pray to defend

He will try just once

To come home again

His scent still strong

And clothes on the shelf

Toothbrush remains

With everything else

I hurt to hope

I cry to feel

Knowing this heart

Can never heal


Fears


Fear #1

You know what really scares me

Still now at the age of forty one

Is being all alone and unable to see

There’snowhere leftto go, nowhere left to run

You know what I am afraid to feel

Is sickness, or any form of pain

Aging is a process, a part of the deal

But what if the first to go is my memory, my brain

You know what I don’t want to lose

The chance to amend many a wrong

To die without sharing, thoughts I’ve used

To share regret, to honestly be strong

You know what I worry about

Never knowing what it’s like to live clean

Even for one week, without any doubt

Willing with the desire, as part of their team

You know what I don’t want to have to do

Is stand in mourning over someone I care

To have to accept the loss of more than a few

More death seen to early, or tragically unfair

You know what I can’t handle not seeing

My own little dream, and I’m running out of time

To give my heart, which belongs to all their being

And show them as always, they have been truly mine

You know what I was shown Thursday

How true loss really and deeply feels

To cry so hard breathing hardly could I keep

Where denial is the only way to deal

Fears, part of the deal, so I am learning

 


The Brothel’s Ceiling Fan


An electric ceiling fan.

the brothel‘s ceiling fan

as my memory rests

i never forget why i loved

they told me innocence will never last

i am 40 something, needing to be hugged

once drenched in pain

choked back in childhood

when i would dip my right hand

in that gray flour and its gravity

love is so rare

a handful of ash holds

the entire world’s weight

i belong a long way from here

will you plunge through my home door?

announce by dance you are here

get me tied in a love knot, bitten free

let’s still get stoned

show me your veined hands

we’ll play and slumber in my life boat

only to wake, feeling your breath

on my neck. don’t tell me i am beautiful, show me

let me learn from your animistic release  (animalistic?)

depend on this breeze, as we do our chemicals

to cease my fear your embrace that seeks to still me

truth is i need to be inspired and dream of you

it’s true there must be an angel smiling on her face

when she thought up ways to put one on mine

only in tears though do i speak in the dark

keep your predatory clench in your powerful jaw

it hurts to eat, so you surrender my needs

inspiring me, releasing me, strengthening me

now gathering up moms clothes for the poor

a litter of souls, i love as i was protected

dreadlocks or crew cuts,i spend with my life

pleasing up my men, only one broke

blown open, a girl again for the first time

i listened to the earth’s heartbeat, finally

i am inspired, everyone i miss left hurt

some have claimed my heart as theirs

when my last love came, he slid a palm

across my eyes and lent me his mouth

laid his head in the middle of me

bent me, and my face rests on the

meadow of his chest, again to listen

to the earth’s heartbeat

i see many windows vacant

no one keeps the brothel’s ceiling fan

or the infants mouth sewn shut

suppose none of us stay in one place long

last night my dream was so deep

my bed came unroped from it’s actions

my father in the doorway, dead

just home from the graveyard shift

inspired as i possess that brothel’s ceiling fan

it has seen all that i do

it is silent and wicked

i find comfort as it has seen worse

it’s blue

my brothel’s ceiling fan

my favorite toy and rhythm

count its turns, as it drills a new hole

tragic

tricks of magic

mix it

or magic in tricks

depending on the gift of its breeze

while doing chemicals

expired

piles of condoms

blue.

my magic brothel ceiling fan.

kindle or smashwords or createspace


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